Two Days Later
by Skinnyblackgirl
Summary: "I can be the mother of your kids, or I can be your old lady. But I can't be both." What happens when Kyra and Juice are forced to make tough decisions about their future? One shot in the Juice/Kyra series. Follows "The Evolution of Kyra James." AU Juice/OC


**_A/N: Hey everyone! I know it's been awhile since I've posted, but I'm here with a quick one shot for the Kyra/Juice series. With such a heavy s5 of SOA, I wanted to give you guys something light and hopeful. It picks up a couple of months after where "The Evolution of Kyra James" left off. (If you haven't read that one, it's probably best that you get caught up before reading this.) _**

**_Thanks for checking it out! As always, please read, comment, and share! _**

**_- SBG _**

It'd been two days since she sat him down at their kitchen table and told him that she had Tara give her a pregnancy test at the hospital. Two days since she looked up at the calendar and freaked out because her period was an entire week late and she hadn't noticed because she was too busy trying to figure out what was up April Hobart's ass at work, hiring contractors to start on the extra room they were adding to the house, and making sure she never left home without her .38 because the Niners were feeling "twitchy." She figured the fatigue that had recently made processing invoices and managing payroll more difficult than it had ever been was a direct result of her life being too damn hectic at the moment. And that when things died down her routine seven hours of sleep would once again feel like enough.

Until two days ago when she realized she might be pregnant and couldn't remember if they'd used a condom that afternoon six weeks ago at Jax and Tara's wedding when he had her bent over in the bathroom at the reception hall. Couldn't recall if she'd bought a Plan B pill just in case because she'd changed birth control brands and would need a month before they kicked all the way in.

Instead of worrying herself sick, she spent her lunch break that day at St. Thomas, peeing in a cup and giving it to Tara with strict instructions to keep the results, whatever they were, to herself.

It'd been two days since Kyra told Juice that she wasn't pregnant. They were eating dinner. She'd finally perfected the plantains he'd loved as a kid and was happy to watch him devour the contents of his plate. She knew there was no real need to announce the test results, but they promised "no secrets," and they'd come too far for her to violate it. So she watched the color drain from his face when she said "I took a pregnancy test today" and saw the color slowly return when she said "Don't worry, I'm not." But before he could go back to pleasantly chewing his plantains, she said to him "And I don't think I ever want to be."

Juice put down his fork, letting his eyes lock on hers. "You don't?"

Kyra sighed. Because there was no easy way for the words to come out. "I made a decision to be with you, here, no matter what, because I love you and there is nowhere else in the world I want to be. But this," she paused, "this is no place for a kid."

"So if you were pregnant you would've-"

"Not without talking to you," she cut him off. "Because if I got pregnant, and a kid was something you really wanted, I couldn't rob you of that."

His brows crinkled, trying to meet in the middle of his forehead. "So, you'd keep a baby that you didn't want for me?"

"What I'm trying to say is if I got pregnant and we decided to keep it, I would have to leave."

"Leave me?"

"Leave Charming."

"I don't understand…"

"It's one thing for me to accept the risks that come with being with you. Whatever the consequences, it's my choice. But if we have a kid, it's not just about me anymore. And I don't know that I can be the kind of mother who'll put my love for you over what's best for a baby. It's not fair. I can be the mother of your kids or I can be your old lady. I can't be both."

"So you'd want me to choose between having you or having a kid? That sounds fair to you?"

It sounded awful. But so did having to carry a baby seat on one arm with a gun in her bag. "No, it doesn't. That's why I need to know now. Before some test in the future comes back positive. Before we go any further I need to know that you're okay with skipping kids altogether."

Juice looked down. Kyra couldn't tell if he was looking at the table or his plate, but his eyes grew wide as he let out a long exhale. "Are you?"

As many times as she laughed or smiled at the adorable things Abel and Tommy did in her presence, or how wonderful Jax and Tara looked with their two boys, she rarely felt the desire to duplicate their family unit with Juice. Under different circumstances, she could be a mother. There was just nothing inside of her that needed to be. She nodded.

Juice nodded his head. Not in agreement, but in understanding. "Can I think about this?"

"Sure. Whatever you need."

"You look really tired. Why don't you go lay down and I'll handle the dishes?"

She always had to threaten his life the morning after she cooked to have the dishes clear before she got home from work. He was telling her to go lay down because he needed space to think. Kyra was relieved that he was taking the space at home and not on the road, or worse, at the clubhouse. "Okay."

Two days later, she stood in the kitchen, putting away dinner that had gone un-eaten because Juice called saying that he'd be home late, and her anxiety over his decision had left her without an appetite for anything but a glass of wine and a joint. So she sipped and smoked and transferred the chicken alfredo she'd made from its pot to Tupperware, wondering what if they'd even be together long enough to finish the leftovers she placed in the fridge.

He'd been distant over the last few days. Courteous, but in his head. She had no idea what it meant. She felt equal parts relief and dread when she heard the front door open and close, followed by the scrape of his boots against the linoleum in the foyer, followed by the silence of carpet absorbing his sock-covered steps. "Kyra?" he called.

She gulped down the rest of her wine. "In the kitchen!" She didn't want to read his face, so she kept her back turned.

She heard drag a chair across the kitchen floor. "You gotta minute?" he asked.

Kyra put out her joint and approached the table. Juice was leaned back in his seat, with a joint of his own. Despite her best efforts to calm down via booze and weed, she was still anxious.

He sat up straight and lit his joint. Taking a healthy hit, he spoke through the smoke. "So I thought about everything. Haven't really stopped thinking since the other night...

"The thing is, we know old ladies that are mothers. Gemma, Tara, Lyla. And I look at you. You're just as tough as Gemma. Smart as Tara. As...whatever the hell Lyla is to Ope. Maybe cuz you're my girl I think you're better than all of em really... So it's crazy to me that you think you can't do both. I think you can do anything."

Kyra rolled her eyes. "But I'm not-"

"I know, babe," Juice held up his hand. "Just let me finish. I thought about what it would be like to have a little you or a little me running around, and I can't say that it wouldn't be pretty cool. And you gotta know I'd skin anybody alive who tried to hurt you or our kid."

She hated that Juice's threat sent a warm rush down her spine. In the last year, she'd seen how quickly he could go from doting to dangerous. And the fact that his words just made her want him more showed her how committed she was to his world. Too committed to be anyone's mother.

"But I thought about all the shit that's happened to everyone's kids: Abel, Opie's kids not having him around when he was in Chino and then losing Donna. I get it. No kid should have to go through that.

"And you're like, the best thing that's ever happened to me. Next to the club, cuz without the club we never would've met. I guess what I'm saying is I can do without having kids. I can't do without you."

Kyra didn't want to show signs of relief. Didn't want him to know how worried she'd been that he'd leave her. There was a sigh inside of her that she hoped wasn't audible. She slowly relaxed her shoulders. "You're sure about this?"

He reached into his pocket. "Well, that's the other part. Because I spent a lot of the last two days thinking what life without you looked like. That's not something I want. And I'm so sure about it that..." he fumbled for a moment before placing a small, velvet, navy blue box on the kitchen table, "...I want you to be my wife."

Her mouth went dry as she stared at the box. She blinked twice and swallowed the lump in her throat, wanting to make sure that she was seeing and hearing correctly. "You do?"

"Shit. I did it wrong, didn't I?" And because the sight of him stumbling through a proposal was so...Juice, Kyra chuckled as she watched him open the box and ease out of his chair and onto one knee in front her. _This is really happening_, she thought as she stared down at a simple princess cut diamond on a white gold band. He said her name and the tears started. She wanted to look in his eyes as he said the words, but her eyes watered more with every blink until he was a brown, black-clad blur on the floor in front of her.

"Wait," she said, wiping her eyes. Because this would only happen once and she didn't want to be a blubbering idiot. She wanted to see him. To answer him clearly. She always thought marrying Juice would be a formality. It was understood when she inked his crow on her back, when he tatted her name on his heart, when they bought a house together, that they were in it for the long haul. But at the moment it didn't matter that they'd been living as partners for a little over a year. Or that they'd just had a pregnancy scare. Or that the Niners were twitchy. Or that she'd spent the last two days thinking they may be over. The love of her life was on one knee with a diamond and she didn't want to miss a milli-second of the moment. Not even for the sake of her tears.

"Is everything okay-"

Kyra cleared her throat and settled on Juice's face. His eyes were wide with worry. He was scared shitless. She nodded her head. "Yes."

He raised a brow. "Yes, everything's okay or..."

She smiled, biting down on her bottom lip. "Yes, Juan Carlos Ortiz. I will marry you."

His boyish grin spread across his face. "Holy shit. Yeah?"

She nodded again. "Yeah."

Juice slid the ring onto her finger and now that she could see it clearly, she was pleased with the size. The light hit the diamond at an angle and it gleamed proudly. She didn't know carat sizes off hand, but she knew her man had done good. "Now you know, as soon as this ring's all the way on, everything else has to come off, right?"

She thought of being spread naked across the kitchen table and felt a pool of heat between her thighs. "That how this is gonna work? You bring home something shiny and I have to strip on the spot? What if I wanted to call Aunt Neeta? Or Tara?"

Before Kyra knew what was happening, he wrapped his arms around her waist, lifted her from the chair, and threw her over his shoulder. "You can call them after I'm finished fucking my fiancee."


End file.
